Happy New Year

1 Jan 2006

................................Happy New Year!
.............................
.................. 2006 - The Year of the Red Dog (Not yet though)

2005 was quite a year, a bit of a watershed year for me really. I don’t know why, though. It was not like at the end of 2004 I demanded change, that at the end of year I walked out of the traditional new years eve gathering, looked to the skies and howled at the moon -

“As the lord is my witness! This year will be different!!
Things will change! They must change.
Never again (clenches fist) will I generate late fees way in excess of the actual fees for my video store!
Guitar Picks! (clenches buttocks) I laugh in your face! Hah! Hah! Hah! because, this year. . . you will not escape my clutches!!
The plan is ! marriage! Baby! House! And so on . .
Hah! Hah! Hah! (laughs like maniac swinging head from side to side..) “

Mind you maybe the answer does lie in the stars. At least the astrologically minded would have you believe so. People like our friend, the mysterious Alana Z, who has a bob each way, star sign wise, by following the Chinese sign as well as the traditional one. So last year, maybe Virgo was in Libra’s quadrant. And maybe Libra resented the intrusion so it decided to make someones life change, namely mine. OR maybe in the Chinese system 2005 ‘the year of the green chicken’ meant changes were a foot. I would certainly like to change the green chicken for a brown one, unless it was thai green chicken, which I like.

Over the last year I’ve also started this blog. It has had it’s own rewards and is free and remarkably easy to do. When I started doing it I wondered whether I would have enough to write about. As it is, I have too much. And I have had several blogs I have written or begun but felt the time was not right to issue them (My ‘ode to Noel’ for instance, a peek into the miserable world of John Pilger). I also wrote one about barbeque’s but realised I could say so much about them that one blog was not enough. I could write a bloody book (“The construction and operation of the haphazard barbeque in any environment or situation”)
OR do an endlessly extending series. And because it is such an important topic I know that I have to do it justice, otherwise I should not start.

Last week I titled the blog “You can observe a lot by just watching’”. it is a foolish, nonsense quote by American sports personality Yogi Bera who has almost as many idiotic quotes as the inimitable Murray Walker. But I think the quote makes some sort of strange sense. Just shut up and watch the mundane and it’s amazing what you can come up with. Look how much milage I got out of the sausage sizzle at the Warehouse ( the last two blogs??!!) If you can write about crap like that you can write about anything.
I think (therefore I am) a terrible ‘watcher’ Or a great watcher, depending on which way you look at it. (Beware! Jimi Kumara come to WATCH, at a Barbeque near you!).

Like everyone else I got caught up in the election. Mostly because it appeared as though their was a veer right and that the ground swell of public opinion was going sweep Brash and co into parliament. That didn’t happen, but the result was far from satisfactory. Labour shat on my fijoa wine soaked friends, the greens, and it pisses me off, still.

My favourite politics post was my pre-election sum-up, because I had to write quickly cos we were going out and because it is funny and places the whole election in a skewed, nonsensical perspective, which is where it belongs somehow.
I did one blog where I mentioned food but I really need to do more in the new year because I love food and I love it’s history, it’s social use and everything to do with it.
Mostly I like to eat it.
I need to write more music and telly stuff. I began a ‘guide to Coronation Street’ but again, because it is such an important matter I never finished it in a way I was satisfied with.

My only music blog was about the 3d’s and more like – my, ah those were days… sigh of nostalgia.

I don’t think I have one favourite blog but I like the one about fishing and also some of the ones about having a baby on the way.
Of course I have written about impending fatherhood. It is somewhat encompassing, after all, so I couldn’t avoid it.

At the moment we are entering a phase where we are actively encouraging the baby out.
We have a selection of old wives tales we are working through. Things that people have advised us will bring on the labour.
Later today we will go for a big walk, for instance.
(“It always works mate. I guarantee it”)
The book also advised having a curry. But we have curries all the time and I think that only works on people who aren’t used to it. I cant imagine it working on Indians for instance.
Having sexual intercourse is a hot topic too. Everyone seems to feel they can advise us on our sex life;
“Have a shag. It works everytime. Use this position (grabs pencil and scribbles down figures and detailed instruction). While your doing that grab your wifes breast thus. . .”
I wouldn’t mind but I really don’t feel a gas station attendent should become that familiar with his customers.

Anyway, the word ‘induction’ looms over the horizon. In the far distance through my doubting Thomas telescope I can see the phrase, ‘cycle of intervention’ and around the corner on a gingham tablecloth is a Caesar Salad. Mmmmmm.

The highlight of my year was our wedding. Friends and family rallied, we took a punt and it landed just inside the touchline, 5 metres from the line. All I had to do was turn up to score. We were worried about the weather but it was a superb day and that night the stars came out to play. We even got together a few bands and ran few some old show tunes.

‘Love, love will tear us apart again. . . ‘

It did and 2006 promises more of the same.

Hip hip horray!!