Sect and Violence | 3rd June 2005

I may be on to something that will overshadow anything this 'deep throat' fellow ever achieved with his mates from the Washington Post.
Something secret, something dark, something...
I rediscovered THE ITEM BELOW in my extensive archives. It is an advertisement from a little known Monty Python Booklet from the 70's. P






I'll make you a MASTER of LLAP- Goch




.... the Secret Welsh ART of SELF DEFENCE that requires NO INTELLIGENCE, STRENGTH or PHYSICAL courage

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WHAT is LLAP-GOCH again? It is an ANCIENT Welsh ART based on a BRILLIANTLY simple l-D-E-A, which is a SECRET. The best form of DEFENCE is ATTACK (Clausewitz) and the most VlTAL element of ATTACK is SURPRISE (Oscar HAMMERstein). Therefore . . . the BEST way to protect yourself AGAINST any ASSAILANT is to ATTACK him before he attacks YOU . . . Or BETTER... BEFORE the THOUGHT of doing so has EVEN OCCURRED TO HIM!!! SO YOU MAY BE ABLE TO RENDER YOUR ASSAILANT UNCONSCIOUS BEFORE he is EVEN aware of your very existence!
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Banish Inadequacy No longer need you feel WEAK, helpless, INDECISIVE, NOT fascinating and ASHAMED of your genital dimensions. No more need you be out-manoeuvred in political debate!! GOOD BYE HUMILIATION, Wisecracking bullies, Karate experts, boxing champions, sarcastic vicars, traffic wardens; entire panzer divisions will melt to pulp as you master every situation without INADEQUACY. PROTECT YOUR LOVED ONES.
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HOW do I learn? No, you mean 'How do You Learn'. I know already.
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Only a FOUR-SECOND WORK-OUT Each Day! and you will be ready to HARM people
DEVELOP UP TO 38 BICEPS
GROW UP TO 12" TALLER
LOSE UP TO 40" OF FAT IN YOUR FIRST WORK-OUT!
PROLONG YOUR LIFE BY UP TO 1,000 YEARS
GO TO BED WITH UP TO ANY LUDICROUS NUMBER OF GIRLS YOU CARE TO THINK OF PROVIDING YOU REALIZE THIS STATEMENT IS QUITE MEANINGLESS AS THE PHRASE 'UP TO' CLEARLY INCLUDES THE NUMBER'NOUGHT'
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I was studying this ad and wondering whether to send away some money, when it occured to me that the ideas here resembled VERY closely the defence policy of the US. Eventually I said to my self, in capital letters -

"IS GEORGE BUSH A LLAP-GOCH MASTER?!









Lets look at the facts.

LLap-Goch requires NO INTELLIGENCE, STRENGTH or PHYSICAL courage.
tick,tick,tick.
Bush is not a BIG MAN and his limited intelligence is a matter of public record. Look at the following quotes which he may have said -

"And one of the things we've got to make sure that we do is anything"

"We're making the right decisions to bring the solution to an end"

In recent times, only Dan Quayle was a more fully ACCOMPLISHED IDIOT.

"I was recently on a tour of latin America, and the only
regret I have was that I didn't study latin harder in school so that I could converse with these people"
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Now lets look at the central maxim of the Llap-Goch doctrine -

the BEST way to protect yourself AGAINST any ASSAILANT is to ATTACK him before he attacks YOU . . . Or BETTER... BEFORE the THOUGHT of doing so has EVEN OCCURRED TO HIM!!!

Sound Familiar? The good people of Iraq had NO INTENTION of invading the US and yet George Bush resolved to attack their country, and BRING THEM FREEDOM - even if he had to kill every last one of them to do it.



What about Guantanamo Bay? The policy there is surely an extension of this thinking as well.
ARREST AND DETAIN citizens before they have even contemplated attacking you and yours. Anecdotal evidence from left wing websites suggests many of those detained are HARMLESS - farmers, toilet attendents and even HAIRDRESSERS.
My last haircut was bloody awful, but would I want my hairdresser, Fabio, to go there and have to wear a GARISH SHADE OF ORANGE?
Of course not. It would kill him to be that unfashionable.

FACE THE FACTS - the new-world-order power now lies with those who belong to this secretive sect (is there any other kind?). Forget the FREEMASONS. They have NO POWER anymore because everyone uses concrete.

I wouldn't be surprised if Dick Cheney, Condolessa Rice (if ever a name was an anagram of something it's that one)
and Wolfowitz belong as well.

Watch this space.. SOMETHING is out there...we just have to find out what it is..